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angels
Judaism/Christianity
Angels are sexless, incorporeal spirits. They descend from strange Babylonian chimeras called nergal with the heads of men, the bodies of lions, and the wings of eagles. At some time in history, they lost the lion body and became the pinioned humanoids who adorn our graveyards, Christmas trees, and curio shelves for porcelain figurines. They perform many functions including delivering messages from on high, guarding us from evil, granting prosperity to our households, inspiring poetry, parting our souls from our bodies, leading us to our postmortem existence, judging us, punishing us, pushing planets, and providing entertainment in massive choral ensembles. They are, I believe, a relic from a polytheistic period when Yahweh asked not to be the only god, but to be recognized as the leader among them.

It is not usual, but four or maybe eight times mortals have become angels at death. The names of the eight are:

  • St. Anne, mother of the Virgin Mary, became Anas, an angelic spirit who medieval healers invoked against fevers.
  • Asaph, who was renowned for his skills as a healer and a psalmist during his lifetime, became the master of the heavenly choir that sings the Lord's praises at night.
  • Elijah, some say, always was an angel. He rode to Heaven aboard a chariot of fire (2 Kings 2:11) and assumed the name Sandalphon, twin brother of Metatron. Myth has it that he battled the Angel of Death and nearly vanquished him before God intervened to preserve the Malthusian order.
  • Enoch walked with God and, according to Genesis 5:24, took an especially long stroll one day from which he never returned. Apocrypha say that Enoch wrote 366 books during his lifetime and, when he became Metatron, burst out with 365,000 eyes and 36 wings. The large number seems to have been necessary for his new role as King of the Angels.
  • St. Francis of Assisi became the angel Rhamiel.
  • Heman, whose name means "trust", became the choir master who leads the hosannas of the morning after a life of service directing music at the Temple. Psalm 88 is dedicated to him.
  • Jeduthan, the Master of the Howling, leads the hymns of praise to God in the evening. He, like Heman, was a choral director at the Temple.